The Friends Every Gal Needs…And Doesn’t Need

Whether you are a urban, suburban, or country girl, you have to have a good friend or two or three. I was in a retrospective mood one day and thought about some of my best friendship experiences in my life. Whether you have a friend for a lifetime, a season or a reason we are not islands and we are meant to have someone (out side of family and romantic partners) to share our lives with. I am a firm believer that friendship is important whether I am married, a parent or chilling in a nursing home.

So here are my list of the top friends every gal needs and the top friends every girl should avoid.


Mentor- Not every friend can be all things, sometimes they have that one true purpose for you and an informal mentor in your sister-friend roster is a must. I usually encounter them at work and they are older and wiser and having them in my life has aided me successfully in my career and personal life. That’s my Sophia.sophia

Ride or Die- Not that I plan to commit a crime but if I ever were to loose my mind, it’s good to have a friend who’ll be there to bail me out or sit in the cell with me because she was my partner in crime. Or at the very least a friend who will trek over to give me soup and cold medicine when I’m too sick to go on my own to get it. That’s the Thelma and Louise.

Positive- Whether we tell them we appreciate them or not everyone needs a friend who will be there to lift you up and offer a kind and encouraging word. That’s the Sinclair.sinclair

Funny- This is an easy one. I like to laugh and I like to crack jokes. It’s important to have a friend to kid around with and chuckle it up with over a good brunch, on a trip, over email or while binge watching a favorite show on the couch.

Inspirator- Kay, so I made this word up but the point of it will make sense. We all need that friend who is doing big things, following their dreams, reaching a goal. Whether it’s being stylish and influencing us to look a bit fancier or them crossing something off their bucket list which inspires us to reach a goal of our own, it’s important to have a friend that we kind of look up to which in turn motivates us to do better.


Judgmental- I really don’t dig a friend who likes to air her disapproval of everything. If I don’t feel like I can talk to you and not be chastised then I probably won’t reach out to you. I don’t mean to  suggest friends shouldn’t give each other reality checks but there are ways and times to do it.phaedra

Undependable/Flakey- This is simple. If I call you and you constantly don’t respond or never can help when I need a favor or cancel at the last minute, then why are we friends?

Mean spirited- I don’t want a mean girl friend, a hater, a back stabber, someone who tells my business or tries to start mess with me and other people! That is all. kenya

User- I don’t want a friend that always takes and never gives. And that could be emotionally, financially and time wise. I am no one’s sponsor, servant, assistant, parent or fan club. Friendship is a two way street.

Fake- This one is the worst of all. Sometimes we mistake people  for being good friends who are just around to have someone else to  party with or when the time are good. They aren’t people to tell your secrets to, to call when the chips are down or expect anything meaningful from. As long as you know that’s what they are, someone to party with on a Saturday night, then you’ll be okay. It’s when you mistake them for more that you get your feelins hurt. nene


  1. Good list! I’d like to think I’m a mixture of a SInclair and a Ride or Die. If you got a body, call me, I know some places we can bury it!

    The Judgemental friend? Done with them. Not time or energy in my life for any more of that trouble!


  2. I’d like to think I’m the funny (or sarcastically funny one) and ride or die. I should have put the planner in there because that’s definetly me (the joan from girlfriends or charlotte from satc lol)


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