SATC Talk: Where There’s Smoke: Searching for Mr. Right…or Nah?

Ok if I had to pick one season that I adore from this series, this would be it (next would be season five even though it was crazy short due to SJP’s pregnancy). We enter season three with the gals all single, Big now dating soon to be engaged to a twenty something. The ladies party all night and the hung over Charlotte delivers her famous mini statement that every single woman in her late 20s to 40s has probably felt and loosely inspired me to write my book The Mission.

So there are other things that happen in this episode but I’m picking out Charlotte’s theme. She proceeds to start an aggressive search for Mr. Right. Soliciting help from other friends if they know anyone and so forth. They (whoever “they” are) say you always find him/her when you aren’t looking. But, yeah, I’m not so sure. I mean, yeah, “good things come to those who wait” but “God helps those who help themselves”. And isn’t the latter the theme that society seems to follow? You want a good job? Go to school, do good work. You want to lose weight? Eat better and workout. You want to travel or buy a house? Save up your money. You want a good relationship?…wait Er, that isn’t the motto!

So we have dating sites, matchmakers, dating books, wingmans etc. We recognize that that special someone isn’t necessarily going to pop up at your door or run into you at the grocery store. Sure they can but just how long are we willing to wait and do nothing?

 As I get older I easily see the frustration women of all races and backgrounds can have with dating, especially in a town like DC. Sometimes it feels like we are on a never ending game of The Bachelor. We are all beautiful, talented, successful, will we get the rose? Ugh, so not with it. I’m on that Generation X/Millennial line so, yes, I like to be rewarded and get instant gratification. Dating in DC is the total opposite of all that. I feel special and it can be pretty frustrating when I don’t find that others treat me like I’m the pretty, pretty princess (ok not exactly like that but you get what I’m saying).

So there are times where we (men and women) have to take matters into our own hands and at least make a little attempt to seek out love. If I can look for a parking space for thirty minutes in the U st area on a Friday night I sure as heck can swipe right or left on Tinder. Baby steps, but steps at the least.

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