SATC Talk: Don’t Ask Don’t Tell – Should We Lie to Get Dates?

This is episode 12 of season three. The cringe worthy one where Carrie confesses to poor Adian that she’s been having an affair with Big. But that’s not what I focus on here. In this episode Miranda, the lawyer, goes on a speed dating event and finds the guys are bored with her as the lawyer but perk up when they hear she is a stewardess (of course she isn’t) and she lands a date to Charlotte’s wedding (it all is a mess at the end of course).

Buuut in a town like DC being a lawyer is a dime a dozen and yet we are very concerned about jobs. The first question after asking one’s name is, “So what do you do for a living?”. Yes, we can be pretentious and education snobs in this city of politicians and “game changers”. Our jobs can become our lives. I am often surprised at the amount of questions I get about my job from guys before they ask (assuming they ever ask) about anything else in my life. I noticeably see a difference in a guy’s conversation and tone when he hears the word lawyer. I am quick to correct and say that I don’t practice anymore but instead of the interest in me doing something not so “boring or aggressive” and more “sexy” as in the clip above there is more of a “oh you’re just being modest” feel and they want to know more.

DC folk like book smart folks with impressive jobs. Even though we all practically have the same jobs. Lawyer, government worker, doctor, something in politics, IT, engineer of some sort, military. Rinse and repeat. The appeal to have an “important” job has never been stronger in a town so I can picture someone beefing up their resume. I’ve had a few guys spin something like a contract data entry clerk into a business owner. I’ve had a few guys not want to divulge their jobs as well. I’m not that picky as long as it is legal and pays the bills  (I’m no ones suga mama)

However, let’s not limit it to jobs. D.C. is full of people who just “love” to workout. I mean, I do it but I don’t love it. It’s empowering and all but if I could take a pill that would make me toned, strong and healthy I would. So guys become really impressed when I tell them I jog. But I’m no liar I add that I also walk part of that workout too. I even had a guy ask to go on a first date jogging (da hell, that is so not Type A Cosmo Girl). In this town, I’d be ashamed to say I don’t work out.

And then there is the eating lifestyle. We DC people like to eat. Especially clean eating and cooking. I’m not a big cooker (I can but it bores me) but a question I usally get is “what do you like to cook”. Er, pasta, I dunno. I’ve seen guys limit their dating to women who are “clean eaters” or wanting a partner who eats grass just like they do. I had a friend mention going out on a date and a guy questioning her because she ordered the steak at dinner (she’s like a size 1, mind you). So sure, I take a little pride when I say I don’t eat red meat but avert my eyes when I admit I haven’t given up pork, yet, but I will, I swear. The judgement is real in these streets!

So would I lie to get a date? Nah, who wants to keep up the façade? But I truly understand the pressure in certain environments to want to lie. Yet, let’s be real, the person who you are really meant to be with will take you as the burger eating, random exerciser, that you are.

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